


Throw Me To The Wolves (And Jump In After Me)

by unrestrainedpassion



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Drug Addict!Will Solace, Drug Addiction, M/M, True Love, Werewolf!Jason
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-23
Updated: 2015-02-23
Packaged: 2018-03-14 16:49:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3418211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unrestrainedpassion/pseuds/unrestrainedpassion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jason wants Nico to elope with him, but there are three obstacles in the lovers' path. </p><p>1) Jason was thought to be dead for four years previous. </p><p>2) Jason is... not human. </p><p>3) Nico's not sure if he wants to stay with Will or leave with Jason.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Throw Me To The Wolves (And Jump In After Me)

**Author's Note:**

> disclaimer: me no owney anything

It doesn’t bother Nico, not really. It doesn’t bother him when Will doesn’t come home. Not for days. And when Will does, hair mussed, eyes empty, Nico only opens the door, gives him food and water, bandages the swollen braille in the crook of his elbow.

See, it’s because Will blames himself. Will thinks--wrongly, in Nico’s opinion--he should have gone with Percy and Jason on their last quest. He thinks if he’d been there, he could have saved Jason, brought him back. Will had never handled the deaths of his patients well, but now… Now he just fades, like dyed fabric in the heat of the sun.

Nico washes dishes, alone, in the sordid silence of their apartment in New Rome. The oily rainbows in the soap bubbles wink at him. It’s nearing midnight, and he hasn’t slept in two days. Will hasn’t been there in four. Nico doesn’t care. He doesn’t keep a plate out for Will anymore, doesn’t bother. He sits at the table, a bowl of mint ice cream in front of him. The cloud cover obscuring the moon abruptly shifts, a line of silver-mercury light tracing the path from the window over the kitchen sink to the edge of his bowl.

He feels it again. That sense of longing. He wants to leave his apartment, leave the city, walk into the woods. He’s felt it since Jason died, torn asunder by werewolves in the night. There wasn’t even a body to--

An owl hoots. Nico flings his ice cream into the wall, the bowl shrieking and shattering, ice cream oozing down the floral wallpaper. He stands, cutting his heel on a shard of baby blue porcelain. He hisses in pain, angling his foot to examine the injury. The inch long cut drools blood onto the floor.

It’s at moments like these Nico grieves Jason’s death. When the sun is out, when Will is home, when Reyna visits, he finds it difficult to feel the loss. But now, with his blood smeared on the floor, Nico wonders if he should have told Jason, told him… How he’d felt.

A wolf howls.

Will and Nico had fallen apart, and Jason and Nico had fallen together. The growing affection between them hadn’t been platonic, but Nico had been loathe to let it mature. Then Jason, like the idiotic hero he was, had gotten himself slaughtered. Watching Will ruin himself was too difficult, so Nico comforted him, stayed with him. It wasn’t long before Nico discovered moving in with the guy had started out an attempt to keep him safe and had ended with the bone-crushing realization that _Nico should have told Jason._

He lives on the third floor in a building close to the edge of the woods. There’s an oak tall enough to knock its branches on Nico’s bathroom window. He searches for the bandaids in the medicine cabinet, injured foot leaking scarlet on the bathroom rug. A glint of gold catches his eye through the window, and he glances at the oak tree momentarily before returning to his search.

He freezes, turning to the branches once more. A pair of Celestial Gold glasses hang off the nearest bough, the lenses cracked and stained. They’re Jason’s, Nico is certain; the glasses he wore when he died, the glasses no one found. Heart hammering, he slides open the window cradles the glasses in his shaking palms. There’s a note attached.

300 paces North, 250 paces East, it reads. Nico stumbles out of his bathroom and grabs his sword. He’s out the door in six seconds, pounding down the stairs. The night is silent as he sprints across the lawn to the forest. He checks the compass on his phone and follows the directions as carefully as he can. The pull in his chest strengthens as the twigs scratch his bare feet and arms. Cool air rushes in and out of his lungs, puffing into swirling white clouds.

He reaches an empty clearing fifteen feet across. The grass looks black in the darkness, and the only discernable landmark aside from the trees is a huge fallen log, the length hollow. By rough estimate, the diameter is easily seven feet, the narrowing end disappearing into the depths of the forest.

Nico runs his hands through his hair, thoroughly spooked. He should have thought about this, should have discussed it with someone.  Maybe the Hunters found the glasses; maybe the werewolves are using them to lure out prey--except Thalia would have told the Seven, would have brought them the glasses as closure; and he’d already be dead if the wolves were going to ambush him. So that leaves--but it’s impossible. It must be a monster, or some other sick prank, because if Jason were alive--No.

He slowly becomes aware of a deep, throbbing hum vibrating around him. In confusion, he scrutinizes the striped black shadows between the trees. He can’t see anything, can’t hear anything but that menacing--it’s a growl, he realizes belatedly. Something moves inside the log, and Nico stumbles back, tripping over his shoelaces and landing hard on his back. Loam twists under his fingers as he scrabbles backwards, breaths shallow and forceful.

He tries to slow his heart rate--he has experience with monsters; why is he losing it now? A relentless wave of burning panic rises in his chest and curls around his consciousness, turning his saliva to glue and his skin to fire. The… thing… inside the tree trunk rises, and the fuzzy shapes coagulate into something reminiscent of a hound. Nico curses under his breath. It is a werewolf, he is so fucked--this is it, this is how he dies: barefoot, muddy, and alone. Fuck.

The wolf approaches, stretching to its full height. It’s something near six-and-a-half feet tall, and ridged with corded muscle and glossy, storm grey fur. A snaggletooth grin cuts its muzzle in two. Nico whimpers, the noise loud in the still air. The whole forest seems to hold its breath, watching the monstrous canine advance on the rake-thin young man.

The mossy ground dips under its plate-sized paws. It halts, looming over Nico. Blue eyes glow fiercely in the gloom.

Suddenly, black smoke spews from the gaping maw and envelops the wolf, changing its shape from lupine to human. Jason stands before Nico, different but essentially the same: where his cheekbones were round, they’re now sharp as knives; his stance is lean and drawn, no longer proud. His eyes are the same edged blue--before, as the wolf, and now.

“Get up,” he snarls.

Nico complies, head swimming.

Jason reaches for him, and Nico can’t move away. He’s not sure he wants to. Jason puts his hands on Nico’s cheeks, examining his old friend. Nico is acutely aware of the dirt and gristle under Jason’s stubby nails.

“You’re skinnier than you were before,” he says, rubbing his thumbs over Nico’s under-eye-bags. “You look ragged.” His voice is hoarse from disuse.

Nico swallows. He’d spent hours contemplating the things he’d say to Jason if he ever saw him again, and now all he can manage is grating fear. “Are you going to kill me?” slips out of his mouth before he can clamp it shut.

Jason barks a laugh. “No.”

“Okay,” Nico whispers, and then he kisses him.

Jason whimpers and pulls him in close, impossibly close. Nico inhales, breathing the other’s scent in. He’s filled with a sudden desire to consume him, prevent him from ever leaving Nico again. Jason smells like pine trees, cold air, and flames.

Fingers curl in each others’ clothes. Thin pajama bottoms, once barely keeping Nico warm, now feel like the thickest sweater.

Nico yanks Jason’s shaggy blond hair, craning his head back and descending on the werewolf’s throat. Jason gasps. “I think you might have missed me,” he moans, dragging his sharp teeth over the shell of Nico’s ear. “But you sure you don’t want to take me back to your--oh, Jesus--flat?”

Nico’s fractured mind suddenly gathers itself together, and he shoves Jason off him. He tumbles into the edge of the hollow log, scraping his hand on the gnarled wood. “What, now you finally crave civilization?”

“I didn’t mean--”

“You want me to get you off in my nice, comfy bed, Jason, huh? Is that what you want? So you can disappear with a clear conscience for another four fucking years and let everyone else think you’re dead?”

“It’s better off this way.”

Nico scowls. “Yeah, I know. Jason the Hero doesn’t wanna be a mangy mutt. But he is, and just--appearing out of the blue one day is plain _unfair_ , Jason, come on.”

Jason cocks his head to the side, all vulpine and hard. “I came back, didn’t I?”

“You think you can just walk back into your old life? Dying has repercussions.”

“I didn’t come back for that.”

“Then--” Nico swipes his sleeve over his mouth, understanding sweeping over him. “I have Will.”

Jason licks the blood off the torn flesh of his palm and glares at Nico. “And you’re happy with him?”

Nico laughs humorlessly. “No, of course not. But you think he’d be--be the way he is if you had just come home?”

Jason spreads his arms in a grandiose gesture. “I am home.”

Nico clenches his fist against the sudden urge to break Jason’s face. “Bullshit.”

“I was raised by wolves, damn it. I came from this. Don’t you think--”

“You told me I was your home,” Nico says, and he’s ashamed of how small he sounds.

For the first time since their reunion, Jason looks uncomfortable. “You--you were the one who rejected me.”

“Maybe I was wrong,” Nico says. He’s never sounded so defensive. “I’m going back to my bed, and I’m going back to sleep. You can stay and chase rabbits or whatever. I don’t care.”

Jason watches him warily, leaning against the log. “Three hundred steps North, two-fifty steps

East. I’ll wait for you.”

“You’ll be waiting a damn long time.”

As it turns out, Jason only waits a week.

-

Nico attends Percy’s twenty-second birthday party, and--surprisingly--doesn’t immediately regret it. The Seven lost contact after Jason’s… well, disappearance, and this is the second time Percy’s tried to reunite them. (The last attempt was his twenty-first birthday, and everyone got drunk and yelled at each other for two hours before passing out.)

He’s happy to see them again. He’ll tell them Jason is alive, and they’ll all be friends again. Nico rings the doorbell and shudders at how sappy he sounds.

Annabeth opens the door, dressed in dark wash jeans and a swishy-looking cream blouse. Her flushed face brightens when she recognizes him. “Nico! Christ, it’s been too long. Get in here.” She hugs him tightly and yanks him inside.

She releases him and examines him, hands on his cheeks. It reminds Nico of Jason’s touch--the first time he’d thought about their kiss in a week (and isn’t that the worst lie you’ve ever heard?). Against his will, he begins to doubt the positive ramifications of telling the Seven (Six?) Jason’s alive. They’ll freak. He knows they will. They’ll also probably hate him, or Jason, or both.

“You look tired,” she exhales, embracing him for a second time. “Where’s Will?”

Nico stiffens. “Out,” he mumbles into her throat. She smells like lavender and parchment.

She nods, pulling away. “You deserve better.”

Nico shrugs. “So does he.” He digs in his pocket for Percy’s present. It’s a small rectangular box covered in midnight blue felt. It looks like it might hold a watch, but it doesn’t. Nico’s nervous. Does he want to do this?

Annabeth smiles warmly. “You wanna put it with the rest?” she asks, nodding to a pile of predictably blue-wrapped gifts on a table nearby.

“No. Um, can I be alone with him when he opens it?” He’s afraid Annabeth will say no, that it’s a weird request--because it is--but he doesn’t have to worry.

“Sure. No problem. You want a Coke?”

By the time the opportunity to open the box with Percy arises, Nico’s feeling conflicted. Half of him is enveloped in the warm, familial tide of emotion that comes with being amongst his oldest friends; half of him is slowly drowning in anxiety and nerves. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. What will Percy say?

Hazel and Frank get up to leave, and Percy rises to see them to the door. Nico follows.

Percy embraces the other two and ruffles Frank’s hair. “Don’t be strangers,” he says merrily, and watches them leave. When he turns, he nearly walks straight through Nico. “Oh, Nico, sorry. Did I step on you?” he smiles goofily.

Nico only sticks out his arm, box in hand. “You should open this.”

Percy scrutinizes Nico, then nods. “Okay.” He fumbles with the latch. “So, you having fun?” he asks, tongue peeking out of the corner of his mouth.

Nico rolls his eyes. “Yes, Percy, I am.”

“That’s good, because--” He freezes, box open in palm. Trembling hands lift the golden frames from the velvet. Percy drops the case. “Are--are these what I think they are?”

“That depends; what do you think they are?” Nico says, and he’s trying to joke but his voice is too strained.

“Where did you find them? Did you go back? Did you find anything else? A--a body?”

Nico frowns. “I--um, no. They showed up on that oak tree behind my apartment. There was a note. Directions. I followed them, and--”

“You went alone?” Percy asks, concern etched on his face.

“Yeah, obviously, it’s not like Will was--” he inhales. “Anyway, he was waiting for me.”

“Who?”

“Jason.”

Percy doesn’t say anything, but the knuckles of his hand wrapped around the glasses whiten.

“He’s--”

“A werewolf.”

Nico nods.

Percy whistles, shaking his head. “I--I don’t know what to say. Does he want to meet us?”

Nico exhales. “I think… I think he wants me to go with him.”

“Where?”

Nico swallows. “Anywhere. Everywhere. I don’t--”

Percy places his hands on Nico’s shoulders. “Hey, it’s okay. I know you two--I know. You should do what you think is right.”

“I can’t leave Will.”

He purses his lips. “Will leaves you everyday.”

“He can’t help it.”

“One day he won’t come back.”

Nico knows that. He doesn’t reply.

“Thank you for telling me. I think--I think we should refrain from telling the group until--”

“Until I choose.”

Percy nods.

-

He thinks about what Percy said when he’s stumbling through the woods that night. It’s true: Will is never there for him. As he navigates across a creek, he spots his reflection in the moonlight water.

You look ragged, Jason echoes in his head. He does. Nico is gaunt, thin, and haggard. But to blame that on Will would be cruel. Before Jason’s death, Nico already had a predilection to neglecting himself and avoiding sleep until he collapsed. Will only… made it easier, he supposed. Where his lover should take care of him, Will left him alone. At first he’d been grateful, but now he spends too much time either taking care of Will or drowning in apathy to appreciate the solitude such a relationship affords.

He trips over a tree root and into the clearing. Nothing has changed, except for a thick coating of fog shimmering over the forest floor. It almost looks like it’s bubbling out of the log like smoke out of a dragon’s maw, but that’s just Nico’s imagination getting ahead of him.

Jason isn’t there, human or not.

Brusquely disregarding any disappointment, Nico decides to wait for him--if the wolf doesn’t show in twenty minutes, Nico’s going home.

He watches the spiked ferns drift in and out of existence as the fog ebbs over their green edges. Time passes slowly. He wishes Jason were here.

As quickly as that unwanted thought surfaces, it shatters at the sound of a huge animal tearing its way through the foliage toward Nico. He swallows the surge of panic in his lungs and tells himself it’s only Jason (or so he hopes).

A leaping wolf breaks the tree cover and dissolves into black smoke, reforming in front of him as Jason.

“Hey,” Jason says, eyes on the fallen log behind Nico.

“Why are you here?”

Jason blinks, blue eyes wide. “You’re the one that came to me.”

“I mean, here. In the forest behind my apartment building. Not--not wherever you were these past few years.”

“I got tired of roughing it alone.”

Nico sighs. “And now? What, you want me to come _rough it_ with you?”

He shifts uncomfortably, breaking eye contact. “I--”

“You’re unbelievable. Why would you do that? That’s--that’s a dick move. Percy saw you die, and you didn’t even bother to tell him you were here. He should have been the first you told, not me. Why would--why me?”

Jason rolls his eyes. “I didn’t tell Percy because he’s moving on. I didn’t tell Frank or Hazel because they have each other. I didn’t tell Reyna because she has moved on. I’m telling you because--”

“Because you think my life is shit without you?”

“I think your life is shit, full stop,” retorts Jason, shaking his head. He walks to the edge of the clearing and leans against a tree. “I think you want to run away.”

Nico strides over to him and grabs him by the lapels of his hoodie. “You lost the right to judge me when you disappeared, _full stop_.”

Their eyes meet, and Nico can watch the gears in Jason’s head turn as he considers his next move.

He kisses Nico.

The forest melts away into a sea of deep green and brown. Nico can almost taste Jason’s desperation--or maybe it’s his own.

When they break apart, Nico is panting like a decathlete. “What do you want me to do?” he breathes.

“Leave. Come with me.”

Nico doesn’t reply. He kicks the dirt with his ratty black converse.

“Hey, look at me,” Jason whispers, caressing his cheek. “I’m not gonna make you do anything you don’t want to do.”

Nico gulps, the lump in his throat growing. “Are you--will I… remain human?”

Jason pulls back suddenly. “Whatever you want,” he says, but his expression is closed off.

“I’m not asking because I don’t like the wolf-thing--” Nico says hurriedly. “I accept that this is who you are now, Jason, and--of all the things it could be--this isn’t so bad.”

“Isn’t so bad,” Jason echoes, uncertain. “That’s still--”

“I know.” Nico cups his cheek. “I’m sorry. I think you’re wonderful.”

Jason brushes his lips over Nico’s forehead. “Will you come?”

Nico scrunches his eyes shut. “If Will doesn’t come back in the next two days, yes.”

“What if he does?”

“We’ll see.”

-

Will returns the next day. Nothing is different: his shoulders are still hunched, his hair still tangled, and his eyes still dull. Nico is ashamed to say he’s regretting not leaving the second Jason arrived. He’s choosing between helping a broken man and running away with another. The only difference is, Jason is broken in much the same way Nico once was. Jason helped him out of that dark pit of self-ostracization; it’s only fair Nico help him. (Not to mention he’s almost positive he’s actually, seriously, disgustingly-yet-helplessly in love with the guy.)

After sleeping for six straight hours, Will hobbles into the kitchen and slumps at the table. “How long was I gone?” he asks.

“Nearly a week and a half,” Nico says, leaning against the kitchen counter. It’s seven in the evening; the sunlight slants through the window and lights Will’s hair so it’s straw on fire.

“That’s longer than normal.” He rubs his eyes with the heels of his palms.

Nico nods in agreement. He never knows how to re-assimilate Will into his life when he returns. It’s not like he can discuss the weather, or ask after his health. Another sign he should be long gone by now, he realizes.

“Why are you still here?” Will is staring at him, right at him, for once, and Nico feels naked. “Why are you still with me?”

“I love you.” The words are blocks in his mouth.

“No, you don’t,” Will says, smiling softly. “And you know I don’t love you. I love the--the drugs.”

“That’s not true--”

“I spend more time with them than you. Maybe there was… Maybe there was a time when I could have… healed, but now… I can’t stop. I won’t.”

Nico scoffs, sitting at the table. “May I ask what’s brought on this sudden clarity?”

“I saw him.”

Nico shifts uncomfortably. “Who?”

“Jason. In the forest.”

“Oh.”

“I don’t blame him,” he says. “I know you think I became like this because of him--his death--but all it took was the death of a friend. It could have been anyone. It’s more like--” he pauses, sighing. “It’s the culmination of all my failures.”

“You aren’t a failure.”

Will stares at him for a long thirteen seconds. “Really.”

Nico can’t meet his gaze.

“You should go with him.”

“I don’t want to be a werewolf.”

“You really think he’ll make you?” Will reaches out and touches Nico’s hand. “What’s left for you here?”

Nico splutters “Um, Percy and Annabeth? Hazel? Reyna?”

“You can visit them.”

“Maybe--”

“ _Maybe_ the excuses you make are not intended for me.”

Nico falls silent, mouth agape.

“I’m trying to tell you to go with him, you idiot,” Will huffs. “Stop playing the hero.”

“Are you--are you breaking up with me?” he asks, a smile suddenly breaking on his face.

Will mirrors his grin. “Yep, and I’m kicking you out, too.” He brushes Nico’s cheek with his knuckles. “Leave me to destroy myself in peace.”

“I’ll visit,” Nico insists, clasping Will’s hand in his own. “Fuck, do I pack anything? Do you think he eats raw meat? Does he hunt things?”

Will laughs. “Go ask him, dummy.”

Nico bolts for the door before freezing. “I have to say so many goodbyes--”

His boyfriend--ex-boyfriend--limps after him, chuckling. “You and I both know Hazel will kill you for leaving without word, but as long as you promise to make it back here in six months, I’ll let her know about your… new circumstances.”

Nico bites his lip. “I don’t know.”

“She’ll understand.”

“Okay.” Nico opens the door, stepping outside. Just before he shuts it, he leans back in. “I’ll go tell him.”

“I won’t wait up for you.” Will smiles.

Nico kisses him on the cheek. “You were a good first boyfriend.”

“And you were a good last boyfriend.”

“Don’t--”

“Goodbye, Nico,” he says, and closes the door. The lock engages with an audible click.

That was the last time anyone in New Rome saw Will alive, but Nico will never know that. He sent Hazel a note explaining Nico’s inevitable disappearance, packed a small bag, and left to finish what he started four years ago.

-

Nico sprints to the clearing. He doesn’t stop to breathe once, doesn’t navigate carefully over the creek or the steep, rocky decline halfway along the path.

He finds Jason in wolf form sunbathing in the slanted evening light, fur glistening gold. He morphs back, and approaches Nico warily. “It hasn’t been two days; what are you--” Jason winces. “Oh. He came back.”

“I’m going with you,” blurts Nico. “I’ll even--you can bite me, if it’ll make things easier.”

Jason blinks. “Oh.” He beams. “When do you want to leave?”

“Now. Let’s go.”

He looks like he wants to ask about goodbyes, like he’s concerned Nico’s so ready to drop everything and elope, but something in Nico’s eyes must have told him everything was as it should be.

“Are you cool with riding me as a wolf for now?” Jason says wryly. “You should probably think about the biting thing a bit more.”

Nico nods. “Yeah, that’s fine. But I’m serious; I’ve made my decision.”

“You sound convinced.”

“As long as you’re with me, I’ll be okay.”

Jason inhales slowly, then pulls him in for a hug. “That’s why I came to get you.”

Nico mouths kisses on his neck, humming happily. “D’you have a weird dog penis?”

He starts. “Not when I’m in human form, creep.”

“Okay. Good.” And he’s pretending it was an easy choice for him, but Nico knows the weight of the decision will make this--whatever this is--even better. “You think I’ll be a brooding black hulk of a wolf?”

“I’m thinking more like big brown eyes and paws too big for your body.”

“Shut up.”

“I love you.”

“I know.”

“This is gonna be really cool.”

Nico grins.

 

**Author's Note:**

> THAT MAY HAVE BEEN A SHITTY ENDING; I DON'T CARE
> 
> kudos and comments are appreciated ily guys


End file.
